• Acrylics on canvas
• Measurements: 80 x 60 cm
• Part of my ‘Alopecia’-series

The story behind this painting:

After a stressful year with some bald spots on my head, I was happy when after a few weeks the hair grew back. But then my long hair started to fall out again. From that moment on it went very fast. To take a shower and wash my hair was the most difficult. Because of the pressure of the water, the hair fell out even faster. Anxiety, sadness, panic… After showering I regularly sat in the bathtub feeling completely defeated. I had no idea if all my hair would fall out this time, I could only wait sadly..

At first I was in doubt whether I wanted to paint this part of the story or not. It’s so symbolic of how I experienced that short period of hair loss. Who would be waiting for something like this? I wasn’t sure if I would throw such a vulnerable image of myself into the world. I even felt a little shame. However, the urge to share something about this disease has made my doubts disappear. I also think it’s important to spread a message about embracing your negative and intense experiences in your life. Just by looking at it. To let it be. It was absolutely hard to paint this part of the Alopecia process, but it was also very therapeutic. Now I was able to give it a place, literally.